Once a couple was asked how they managed to stay together for 65 years and their response was actually quite unique. They said “we lived in a time when something was broken, we would fix it not throw it away.” And we find that some people treat relationships like video games. First of all they start by playing them and then when they get bored they quit. I believe we always give advice that we need to take and doesn’t it always seem that everyone has the best guidance for us. And we receive advice from our friends; we analyze and observe relationships on television and in real life. We dream about what it would be like to love as they do in the movies.
Love is promised on countless dating sites and every year you can count on a song by Taylor Swift about a love story where everything is changed but it’s still sweeter than fiction and you’re still in love. They say when you’re happy you enjoy the music but when you’re sad you understand the lyrics. See the challenge is that we’re meant to love people and use things but today we use people and love things. The way we communicate says it all. We spend more time holding our phones than we hold each other; we ask Google more questions than we ask each other. A lot of problems in the world would disappear if we stopped talking about each other and start talking to each other. If we didn’t just share all our issues with everyone but talked one on one then we could actually strike up a connection, strike up a conversation, strike up a discussion, a dialogue that helps us solve the unsolvable problems, the challenges that we’re dealing with on a daily basis. When you’re young you say I love you because I need you. When you grow up you realize I need you because I love you and this is what happens when two peoples who understand themselves come together, they actually are able to enhance each other’s potential.
See relationships are not about compromises, they’re actually about empowering the other person to achieve their goals, helping them grow to become the individual they deserve to become. And therefore it’s not about our selfish motives; it’s not about what we want, relationships are not about us. See what usually happens is that two people together to complete each other. They come together and they depend on each other and this dependence leads to a drain, and this drain leads to more pain and insight into what it feels like to constantly have someone who depends on you for everything. That starts to create a barrier or bitterness between the two individuals where actually one starts to feel that they’re actually carrying the other person the whole way through. That’s why we all need to find someone who makes us want us want to change our life not just our relationship status. Finding someone that makes us want to be at our best. Finding someone that makes us question how we act and behave. Someone who makes us think about our widest possibilities, someone who thinks about our greatest goals and dreams, someone who inspires you. You just need to go and find them.
“The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves.”
-by Victor Hugo